(i originally wrote this november of last year but read it again tonight and was amazed at how much i'm still at this point.)
on my mind increasingly more lately has been a desire to go back to school.
i like to think that an intellectual and even educational environment is part of what defines flourishing for me.
but i'm having a slight hesitation deciding exactly what i'd like to study. a decision here will be followed by an even bigger problem of financial ability.
but... first things first - what does one follow up a bachelor's in psychology and business minor with?
there are a lot of subjects i think i'd like to dabble around in. i'd like to learn web design. and take more social and cognition psych classes. and possibly learn a little bit about journalism. and gain a better understanding of communications and PR. and i just started a book on philosophy that has me remembering how fond of my logic class i was. hello my name is sarah and i'm a student for life.
and of interest for a whole other blog is how very much i am holding a megaphone for the concept of a Renaissance woman... one who "is neither an expert nor a specialist. he or she knows more than just a little about "everything" instead of knowing "everything" about a small part of the entire spectrum of modern knowledge." (http://alexpetrov.com/memes/hum/renaissance-man.html). am i a product of my culture, feeling quite accomplished and proud of ourselves to know a bit about this and a tad about that? does God call us to pursue this kind of broader knowledge or should we live our lives trying to be the best we can be, know the most we can possibly know, about a more specific topic? just thinking out loud here folks (:
of course, my undergrad education would tell me i was learning how to be an independent learner (ok maybe add some english classes to that list) during my time at malone. unfortunately, like my waistline during the holidays, i've let my academic disciplines go and am pretty certain i need a structured environment within which to study and research and learn. at least for now. not that these last 3 years in the real world haven't proved to be full of lessons. but this is focused on the academic world.
which brings me to my next dilemma. (ok not really, but i needed a smooth transition!) the pursuit of knowledge is, in my opinion, a beneficent goal. but who, exactly, does it benefit? you? or the world around you? i don't want knowledge for the sake of knowledge. i want whatever it is i pursue academically to help me to be an agent of change in this world. to the people i am surrounded by, to the ways i live my life, to the way i understand and deepen my relationship with Jesus - to use knowledge to impact those around me and bring His Kingdom to earth.
also running on the mental treadmill is the question - just how do i take all these things that interest me, these things i have talent in and the things my heart is dreaming of and wrap it all up into one nicely adorned package? (and is my inital planning for grad school an attempt to have a fabricated control over this?) i'm just beginning to be somewhat ok with the answer - you don't. life's too messy to allow for this.
"for i know the plans i have for you"... plans to grow you and stretch you and allow you seasons so that all the dreams i also have for you may be accomplished during your journey. (translation from TCV, or the champ's version!) emphasis here on journey. i have an entire lifetime, no matter how short or long that may be, to explore, to pursue, to challenge and to learn. the key is in using any wisdom or insight i might gain, in school or beyond, to become a person who reflects more and more of the Jesus this world needs.