Wednesday, March 11

knock, knock, knockin'

the other morning my car began to make a strange noise. it went something like this... SCRRRAAAAAAATCHHHH! ok so the noise doesn't translate well into word but it was loud and terrifying and definitely not one i'd ever heard it make before (and believe you me, in the last few months there have been plenty of 'em!)

this was quite a distressing situation to me because it seems every time i get one problem fixed on my car another rears an ugly and usually quite costly head. i drove to work as my car made this novel noise, speculating all the way there what it could be using of course my extensive knowledge of cars and their mechanics. (hehehe ;) yes, i'm still 13 at heart and hormones.)

when i got to work i headed around to the passenger side where the noise was originating from to only burst out laughing as i realized all my worries about my car were completely unjustified.

a tree branch was sticking out of the door, clearly having gotten stuck in there the last time i closed that door.

the next day i began my drive to work without incident. as i stopped to pick up mail, i got out of my car and, for the first time ever, closed my finger in the door. it still makes me shudder, thinking about the throb that befriended my undeserving pointer finger for the day.


closed doors. open doors.

it is not uncommon for us to talk about a door that has either closed or opened on our journeys in life. they make us worry, they make us laugh, they make us hurt. sometimes we wish a closed door would open or other times that an open door would close. we relate our walks through life as a series of doors that have either been slammed in our face stopping us from where we thought we might be going or have opened widely inviting us to the next phase of our lives. when we are faced with too many open doors, we hope that all but the one we are "supposed" to take will close.

however, when a door that we hoped to be stepping through closes, we spend time wishing that it would have stayed open and welcomed us over its threshold. i'm at a point right now where i'm standing before a doorway with my hand knocking but it's looking as though my knocking will not be answered. or perhaps that no one is home. (: in any case, it seems i am looking at a closed door.

on the other hand, i have a friend who feels like she is standing in front of a number of open doors, and she finds herself hesitant, wanting to make sure she picks the "right" one to walk through. i'm not sure which situation i would prefer. closed doors can actually provide direction and closure, while open doors leave it up to us to take the risk of stepping through.

 so what is the appropriate response when we find ourselves in another hallway of open or closed doors?

i'm finding the only thing to do is to be thankful. be thankful whether we're starting another chapter or seeing one close before it has the chance to begin. and the only way i can be thankful is by first trusting the One who opens and closes these doors. i trust that He knows better than i do the way my life should go; that He knows the best doorways for me to walk through. and while i lack this foresight i can be thankful that in hindsight i will see the best. so even though closed doors may evoke fear and worry and even hurt, in the end, they bring you new doors or at least some of the best laughs. (:

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