all you ever wanted

lately i've been battling a bad case of the wants.

i want to be married.

i want to have my own home.

i want to be having babies.

i want to not have to work so much.

i want a sweet flat screen tv.

i want to not have to worry about money.

i want to be out of this season of my life and into one where i have all my wants.

these wants try and often succeed throughout my day of making me miserable because i do not have. but i'm tired of living under my wants. i want to be living in my haves. it's time for a new list.

i have Jesus - a relationship with the God who created me and gave me life and who wants to give me life abundantly.

i have a family - a family who loves me and gets me (kind of) and lets me be me.

i have a boyfriend who exceeds all of the expectations i ever had for a partner in this life.

i have friends - many friends, friends in new jersey, ohio, new york, pennsylvania, florida, illinois, north dakota, washington and outside of this country too.

i have a job when so many others are still looking.

i have a roof over my head, a warm home to live in and i never miss a meal.

i have the opportunity to live now and to learn as much as i can in this season, to carry the experience and knowledge with me as i move into different seasons. and i hope that i am wise enough to recognize and remember all of this and use my story to help others, be there for others and encourage others.

all i could ever want pales in comparison to what i have.